gratitude for simple things*

i was going to write a post on connecting with your babies/children before you have met them after reading this beautiful written post by Stacy...and then i thought maybe that is too much for a friday. 

what i can say, is that the other day i was reading in Romans and God said: 'if you believe in Me, I will not disappoint you'.  this is the promise i'm holding on to until we meet our other children. i believe in God and prayer and would like to invite you to pray with us that we will find our way to our children. 

the first post was about connecting with them, moving onto adoption, moving onto very very deep thoughts... but let's rather enjoy this beautiful day in simple ways... enjoying these two silly things with a heart full full full and literally flowing over.

running to the park... 

bella wants to run to the park... on the side walk, very close to the road...she likes to challenge (me) herself and see how far she can go before i strap her up in the stroller... and kellen... he just cycles on and shows us the way...

they know the path to the park and are showing me where to go...
(notice bella is still running..hehe)

she is a little tree hugger... walk with us on the day that she decides today every tree along the road will get a hug...it takes for ever...but with every hug, she gives a huge aaaaaaa... as to really show her love.

one of these days i will have to pay him to smile at the camera...

the two of them...they have my heart. they are best friends. when they wake up in the mornings they look for each other first... hugs and kisses.... he is definitely her favorite person on earth... and she does everything he does...

when we play 'tag' (when last did you play tag? help me... )... this is the face i get when i cannot catch him... he thinks the fact that he is faster than i am, is hilarious.

we played hide-and-seek in the park (when last did you play hide-and-seek?  most amazing experience to see the joy on their faces...) bella does not get the whole hide-and-seek thing yet..she giggles and jumps up and scream and then falls down again... never hide with bella close to you! this was her face when she jumped up to give her 'hiding place' away and i told her she was suppose to be quiet...she was hiding in the slide. quite clever.

when did this happen. this baby girl climbs onto the see-saw and stands on top of the seat, trying to balance standing without holding onto anything. i could only take the first photo because my heart nearly stopped when i realised she is trying to stand on the seat

she looks at the camera and say 'cheese'...

he has such a soft and kind heart.... when meeting new friends he gets a bit quieter and just smiles...

but he is a fierce tree-hugger!

ummm... yes. you can't catch me! (she does everything her big brother does).

and when they are tired, they literally just fell down, lie on their backs and rest! he calls it 'telling cloud stories mama'.

happy weekend!

this amazing life!

in the blogging world it becomes a topic once in a year as to why one blog? for me it is to 'connect', to not feel lonely in a different country and to keep a record of our life for my children one day. yes, also for family and friends to see what we've been up to, but mostly i love to write, and this blog is a space where i can sit down and share... i've been absent although not absent minded... i've been enjoying this amazing life of ours! 

our godchild arrived 3 weeks ago, staying for 3 months. my heart is sooooo full, my time is limited and all we do is giggle and laugh and talk and exercise (hehe...) and giggle some more. 

i thought it only rained when you barbecue in the UK? hehe... forgot about the thunderstorms and monsoon season here in KL.  It is beautiful... and hot.. and the rain is warm and refreshing.  we were invited for a barbecue today... and then it rained.  we will not be stopped...hehe... we were soaking wet but had such fun in the rain. the kids were running around and swimming and playing... for about an hour... before we went up to the apartment.  

when one stays in your neighborhood you tend to forget how much other beautiful places there are around you. my friend stays on the 39th floor of their building and the swimming pool is on the 1st level... which looks out over the whole of mont kiara... it's beautiful..

 and this girl? she is funny and loving and kind and quiet... she is strong and beautiful. she knows what she wants in life. she is brave and adventurous and open for change. she is soft hearted and love(d).
she fills my heart like one of my own children and she sees me. she knows me. she knows my heart. she makes me want to be the best human being i can possible be. this beautiful girl has my heart xx

tips on living the life you imagined*

Life is good. One can really live the life one imagined... it usually is in the day to day living that one realize 'aha! i have imagined a life so full and rich of love and this is it'.

many a night i've imagined how we walk in the rain.... go for walks in the rain... enjoy the rain on your skin.... feel the soft drops of love pitter patter on your skin...

many a night i 've imagined how my children develop en grow...we've been stretching and reaching to be our best selfs... we've been growing and making mistakes and laughing about them... but we always stand up and try again...

many a night i've imagined how we will talk about the beginning and the end of things/life....death is inevitable. it's a subject we talk about in our house. 'fish-fish' decided to move on... we had a funeral, there were some tears and lots of love...

many a night i've imagined how we would read together in bed.  try something new. late mornings in bed with a good good book... getting excited about new possibilities...

many a night i've imagined how our children get into bed with us for cuddles... morning cuddles... or is it more like midnight cuddles leading into morning cuddles...  oh how many a night did i dream about this.... 

many a night i've imagined how i will spend time with my children individually.... it's so important to spend time with each of our children separately.  with kellen it is easy.. he wants to go to a coffee shop, have a doughnut and a juice and chat...

many a night i've imagined how i'm going to feed my children healthy and nutritious meals....this girl loves meat, she sure knows how to eat a piece of chicken.

many a night i've imagined how i'm going to teach my children to take good care of their bodies... brushing teeth is a fun and playful thing in our house... we walk around and dance and hum while we take care of our teeth.

many a night i've imagined how i'm going to teach my little ones to make friends... to be gentle and kind...

many a night i've imagined how my babies are going to sit on my lap and we are going to swing into the sunset...

many a night i've imagined how i take my children to the park...how they cycle and climb and slide... magic...

may a night i've imagined how i'm going to teach them about safety... no problem. you just don't allow anything else than being safe...hehe...

many a night i've imagined how we are traveling the world... how i teach my children that they have the world at their feet... opportunities to expand their worlds... to spread their wings and to fly...

many a night i've imagined how sometimes we will do things we are not proud off or happy about... we try something new that didn't quite work out the way we imagined... we cry, we forgive (ourselves) and we move on... that is what life is about... your try out everything and you do those that make your heart sing!

many a night i've imagined our children being goofy, funny and wild, i've imagined them being kind and soft and caring...

many a night i've imagined how i will stand over their bed/cot and watch them sleep.... these moments, watching them is sleep, are some of the most precious and dear to my heart...

many a night i've imagined how i'm going to teach my children to stand in their light and be proud of themselves.

many a night i've imagined how we go on picnics with treasured friends in beautiful gardens with fountains and geese and ice-cream...

many a night i've imagined my children being creative and free... this designer at the south sea restaurant is just that.  this is in the gents bathroom, kellen is taking a wee and that is their view...brilliant!

many a night i've imagined this life i'm living, not feeling as if it is ever going to happen. the waiting was so hard, the not understanding so not understandable...

but here we are. 10 years later and we are living the life we always imagined.

YOUR dreams are coming true as we speak xx

tips on having fun during looonnggg holidays*

1. dress brightly...the sun is shining... your heart is singing... life is good... (i hope for you too) xx

2.  learn to snorkel... eventhough you may only scuba dive when you are 12... seemingly life is unfair for this 5 year old boy... he wants to scuba dive, gym, play big boy soccer for which you have to be 12 years old

3. work on your balance in the swimming pool... take one step at a time... and smile.. you are beautiful!

4.  wear different hats....literally... make some new ones and if you don't like the hat you have on now, change it. the sooner you do the change, the sooner your heart will sing with happy

5.  play and laugh...try something new. learn a new skill. go on! do it! yes YOU!

6.  swim as much as possible... relax... imagine you are a dolphin in the water... and make the sound of dolphins playing...hehe.. when last did you do that... my brother and i used to play this when we were little... was one of our favorite games....

7.  teach your little sister to breathe in water... or to hold up her breath... of if neither works, just throw water in her face and see what happens. he calls it 'experiment' / or learning her something new / or he wants to see what she does...

8.  get up and live! just do it xx

tonight, angels float in the sky (randomness)*

note:  my blogging has been sporadic due to this... 

but oh! how amazing is every.single.minute with them?! xx

so here are random things around here: 

1.  I'm one of those people that laughs at a joke 3 times: 

     once when it's told to me

     once when it's explained to me and

     once 5 minutes later when i finally understand it. 

      - unknown

yes, this is me :-) 

2.  I could do with this retreat, for many reasons, mostly because i.am.tired. reasons being: 

     a) going to bed too late

     b) getting my 2nd breath at 11pm at night...and then 'have to' go on until my inspiration runs out

     c) a teething baby girl

     d) when the kids sleep at 8pm.... it's my time.... which i treasure

     e) who wants to sleep when there is so many other things to do? 

PS: and then i saw they ran this retreat in 2011....hmmmm... a bit late to the party :) 

 3. i could do with sleep, because this is what our apartment looks like, seriously. every day. i clean up   after the kids went to bed. (so add that to my list above). (we are moving on Wednesday...again... so why worry now?) (the house looks like this because of 'handsfree mama' (note at the top))

4.  there is ALWAYS beauty... with seeing the beauty in our lives all around us, we don't get the time to pick up.... we have to treasure every tiny and big thing coming our way... 

5.  this is where we swim now. we moved (again!). the other apartments were fully booked and
now we have been living here for the past 3 weeks...it's awesome. lots and lots of trees (on the other side)

6.  he has become very independent. wants to dress himself and i try not to interfere, i try to guide...but not always successful. here we went to the shops and he wanted to 'move like mick jagger'. (say no more) (1 trainer and 1 skate)

7.  Tree Mori opened close to us... the most beautiful shop with delicious cakes... and art... foxes dancing off the walls...mmmmm....nourishing my poetic soul

8.  the boy's whole school. he loves it! we think the principal (and the school)  is awesome!

9.  we had a huge party, celebrating the queen's jubilee. it was 'awesome'.  being an international school, there were food from every country... weird and scary food... hehe... 

10.  w a s h i    t a p e ....  heart crumbling... i love xx

11. i cannot wait to take my canon and go for photo walks in this diverse and beautiful country... 

12.  she is light... she moves towards the light as if it is she, as if it is all she knows.

13.  heehee... we laugh most of the day.  

14.  he loves my iPhone and 'making me a gift because he loves me'...which was about 100 self-portraits

15. we are blessed to have made amazing friends last year when we were here.  two amazing women who befriended me and their children are the same age as kellen... we've been spending lots of time with them... in the swimming pool... have i told you that we love swimming? 

16.  these are the steps a restaurant...which have delicious food... but it's more about the friends and family...

17. this girl in the pink, in my pj's, with my kids (and husband)! she is my best friend... visiting us in malaysia... flew over to be with her godchild when she turned 1! a whole post about the girl in my pj's coming soon

'tonight, angels float in the sky'... what else is there to say except thank you for this beautiful life!