Monday, February 18, 2013

holding space & moving on*


this is the most amazing man on earth...

i met him when i was 17 and he was 20. 
we went out for 3 years, broke up for a year, got back together for 4 years, got engaged for a year and a half and in 2000 we got married! 20 years with this guy...it feels like yesterday! 

he is...
considerate, 
kind, 
soft, 
honest, 
open, 
quiet, 
sweet, 
caring.

yesterday he took the kids so that i could sleep in (woke up at 11am)... he let me be... he asked if he could grate the cheese... he fixed the washing machine... he did not ask questions of 'what's wrong' or when are you going to talk..he just let me be. 

yesterday,  i grieved. for the mom that i lost too early. for all the things i still wanted to tell her. for the many times i picked up the phone to quickly call her, and realised she is not here anymore.  i grieved for my children who will never know her funny ways, who will only experience her only through our stories, i grieved for friends who lost loved ones too and prayed that God will keep us healthy and safe so that we can one day meet our grandchildren. 

last night, after i pressed published on the post of my mom's birthday, i went down and thanked him. i thanked him for keeping space and not asking questions. 

and today? today is a new day. it's a beautiful sunny day with endless possibilities. today i'm being assertive and getting this adoption thing on the road again. please pray with us. 

ps: i'm one of the lucky ones...to be married to this man?! biggest gift in the world! xx

1 comment:

  1. I am so proud to say I am your "maaitjie". Proud to be able to say: I was there when you and Marcel met, and o boy u guys were so in love. You have that kind of bond that makes other couples jealous. (In a good way). Tannie Daph was one of the most sincere people I have ever met. No pretence....honest...very honest, and that was a good thing! Luv u always my dearest friend in the world.Lots of hugs and kisses....from a verrrry hot and dry Namibia on this Monday night...

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