Wednesday, February 29, 2012

29 things you have to know about adoption ( L E A P year!)

1.  adoption is magical in every way
2.  it is miracles come true.
3.  it is answers on prayers - 10 years worth of praying
4.  it is more than anything we every dreamed off
5.  it is true - children change your world! :-)

 6.  there are no co-incidences.  bella and kellen have the same surname.  we have 2 court orders. with both children, when i held their adoption court orders in my hands, I quickly opened the letter (because i knew what it said and just wanted to 'confirm') and read:

  '"According to the provisions of Section 242 of the Children's Act (Act No. 38 of 2005),  your adopted child is now for all purposes regarded as your child as if born to you and you are now for all purposes regarded as the parent  of the adopted child."

my eyes filled with tears and the emotion of really being their mama, pushes up to my throat, and i cry and laugh at once, experiencing how great our God is.

                                        first time we met kellen - he put his arms out to 'his daddy' to pick him up.
                                                                             instantly bonded, as if he knew.

7.  you don't 'need time to think about it'. just do it. it is huge and scary and amazing and challenging
and it is love.
8.  adoption is love.
9.  it is a journey. your journey.
10.  nobody really understands except fellow brave hearts going through the same process.
11.  you don't have to say anything. just love and smile and praise God.
12.  show up, and be there. be happy with us (them).
13.  the process is not that long. it takes time, but it is not that long. by the time that you realised you still need this document and that document, you've been so busy trying to be the most amazing mama, that time would have passed and your little ones will be 5 or 6 months older.
14.  from the time we heard of kellen, getting the adoption order and changing his surname to malan, was
5 months.
16. adoption is not tiring. parenting is. :-)
17.  there is no difference whether they came through my body or through adoption...after a hard day, i feel as if i have birthed them.
18.  as a parent, you 'forget' you adopted them.
19.  you think they look like you, you see similarities and you are in such awe of this awesome miracle that is a little boy and girl, that you forget that other people see the difference.
20.  adoption makes you feel loved.


20.  there are sad adoption stories too, but it doesn't need to be your story.
21.  people pity the children (maybe the parents too) when they hear they are adopted.
22.  adoption (and parenting) can be scary and uncertain.
23.  adoption (and parenting) can be bright and happy and absolutely the best thing in your life.
24.  adoption is not a big deal.
25.  it can be, but it's not. it depends on your social worker and where you are in your journey.
26.  adoption is awesome.
27.  adoption is life changing.
28.  adoption is a dream come true.
29.  it is taking a 'leap' into the unknown, it's taking a 'leap' into opening your heart, not half way, all the way, so big and wide that all you have for that little boy and girl, is love, it is taking a 'leap' into loving 'your' child (and yourself) with all that you have.

on this wednesday, this 'leap' day, the 29/02/2012, i sat in the home affairs office in somerset-west, with a court order in my hand, stating that this world  has just 'birthed' a baby girl (adn boy) into my(our) life. sitting alone, with little bella squeeling with joy, with only me knowing why i was there, i felt like any other parent waiting at home affairs to register their child's birth certificate. my heart felt overjoyed with emotion, filled with gratitude towards even just the possibility of adoption, in this moment i surrendered into love.

(surrendering into love for a*)

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