this is for you who are still waiting...

we are waiting too.

we are waiting for our other children.

it's endless.

you don't know anything.

it could happen tomorrow, next month, next year, 2 years from now...or never.

the 'is it going to happen at all' enters one's mind so often...daily... while you wait with every little thing in your heart for your child... you pray, you think positive thoughts, you hope and trust. you stay grateful for the life and children you already have. you try not to feel guilty for wanting more children (when there are so many couples who are still waiting for their first child).

you believe that the plan that God has for your family goes beyond anything you have ever thought... you believe that the plan He has for your family is huge and beautiful and many kids full and happy and healthy and soon. you believe it will be soon, 'at exactly the right time for your family'.

you trust.

and pray.

and trust again.

you live in trust.

you hold to every promise God made in the Bible and you trust in the big big plan He has for you.

thinking back about our life before our kids...how 'we' decided we are going to go on with our lives without children... 'because we choose to do so'...just to have that little bit control in your hands...you made that choice...

and today, with 2 children in our hearts and our hearts waiting in anticipation and patience and trust for our other children.. we cannot imagine our life without children. we, him and i, were put on this earth to parent these children... i know it in my heart.

wanting to have control in the situation is natural and normal.

let it go.

it takes too much energy. energy you can use to pray your children home. energy that you can use to let go and trust that He knows.

surrender.

surrender into trust.

surrender into God.

“God had brought me to my knees and made me acknowledge my own nothingness, and out of that knowledge I had been reborn. I was no longer the centre of my life and therefore I could see God in everything.” 
― Bede Griffiths

it will happen xx

* sending you who are still waiting the biggest and softest, 'i understand' hug... i know how scared you are, i know how much you doubt this truth, i know.

i also know it does happen, and you are loved and wanted and waiting... and yes, you are a mama, you are trusting, because it can happen for you too.